Every Day I Write the Book

Update Pie

2011-06-20T12:25:00.000-07:00

Here's a great pie recipe that makes me ecstatically happy. It also kind of sums up my life right now as far as can be "summed up."

Ingredients:
1 Perfect Guy named Garrett
1 Chick called Kim, sometimes "Skipper"
1 little blue house, aged over 100 years
2 jobs (one archaeologist and one artist)
14 friendly neighborhood cats
19 days until the knot is tied
2 hearts, madly in love
3 years of close friendship (and counting)

For the crust:
Take the friendship, the chick and the guy and mix thoroughly, forever, making sure to keep everything close together. Press into bottom of pan, and save some for the top crust.
Fill the crust with the 2 hearts (they should fill up the entire pie) Cover with the rest of the crust. Sprinkle the cats, jobs, and house on top for added sweetness. Bake at 98.6 degrees until crust is golden, and enjoy. Serve with a side of 19 days, or less if you don't make it today.
Makes 2 servings

Two Thumbs Up

2010-11-05T13:58:00.000-07:00

Song for this post (From Amelie):

La Valse Des Vieux Os by Yann Tiersen

More Yann Tiersen music on iLike

An Unofficial Movie Critic's List of Highly Recommended Films:

(Because that sounds better than "Kim likes these movies.) By the way, this is a short list compared to my entire list of good movies. I just wanted to include some that probably aren't as popular or have
been overlooked. I also picked unique movies that have stood out to me and apart from any others.
It's a rare find.

I wrote details about the movies vaguely, ON PURPOSE. There's nothing better than a good movie that
you have no idea what it's about. Seriously. Please, don't go watching previews on Youtube after you
read this list. If you are afraid of what you'll find if you watch these, then don't even read the list
because you will be missing out.

Amelie- Perfectly French, and full of optimistic realism. Whimsical and visually intriguing. I LOVE this
film. It makes me want to do so many good things.

Love Actually- A Yin and Yang of Love stories all woven together. (Note: Make sure you watch it edited or with someone who knows where to skip during the questionable, and unnecessary scenes.) It's
definitely worth the watch. There are so many love stories (I use the term "love stories" in a completely different way that you'll understand after seeing it) that you are bound to really get into at least one of them. This movie has the best wedding scene ever. Ever.

Harold & Maude- Very quirky and unexpected story. So unique and charming. The characters are people I will wish I really knew. The soundtrack is all done by Cat Stevens!

Léon: The Professional- Dark, but full of innocence. Violent, but focused on the relationship of the two main characters and its development. I saw this movie on TV when I was very young and it really intrigued me. Watching even now intrigues me. Features a scene with one of my favorite songs. You'll know when you hear it.

Finding Neverland- A sweet romantic story. The humor made me smile, but it's romantic, so I wasn't rolling around on the floor laughing. (I don't always have to be)

Holiday (1938)- I love the character of Katherine Hepburn in this film. She is how I love to be. Quick 1930's humor and charm. Cary Grant is also a stud. Short and sweet.

About A Boy- Watch this movie if you've ever:
a) Been a dork.
b) Been a kid.
c) Liked Hugh Grant.
d) Enjoyed music.

The Ghost Writer- (Not to be confused with the early 90's kid show, "Ghostwriter") If you like Alfred Hitchcock, then you will enjoy this film full of foggy shadows and lurking corners. A mystery, and a thriller, but a very steady moving one. This movie had me clutching the edge of my mind, rather than the edge of my seat. By the way, I don't like scary movies, and if this were one, it wouldn't be here.

My middle is gold.

2010-10-31T21:18:00.000-07:00

Soundtrack for this post:

Middle Is Gold by Mates Of State

More Mates Of State music on iLike

Wow.
I'm so neglecting to my blog. I feel that it is malnourished. I need to nurture and love it back to bloggy health.
Enough.
I hate recalling long histories of hows and whys sometimes, so I'll just skip a bunch of boring and say this: I'm about 98% positive that the stomach problems I've had for almost 2 years is because of one thing...(horror movie music please)
Milk.
Yep. After all the horrible tests, doctor visits, and that harsh pain in my side, Garrett suggested I try the no-milk-for-at-least-a-week test, (which I had done unsuccessfully in the past) and I have had no pain!
Anyway, it was a blow because I love cheese and chocolate and butter and everything else good and milky, but I'm just glad it's nothing very complicated. Plus, I love dark chocolate the most, and if it's a good quality, it contains no milk! (Can I get a "woot," please?)

So in honor of my pain-free new dairy free lifestyle, here's a recipe I found that is absolutely, shockingly, richly, and healthily delicious. It's just like ice cream, without the consequences. Seriously, folks, I know that ice cream is one of those things that makes everyone feel like crap after they gorge on it, regardless of food allergies. This stuff will not make you feel that way! Plus, you don't have to eat a ton of it to be satisfied as it is very rich.

Here's what you will need:
Banana(s) - the original recipe calls for 4, but I did it with one the first time and cut all the other stuff down, playing it by my taste preference.
Cocoa -The powdered Hershey's works just fine, and it's what most of us have in our cupboards. And if you'll notice the ingredients list, it says, "cocoa." That's all. Just one ingredient That's rare. And it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy knowing that I'm not adding more unnecessary junk to my food.
Sweetness- I used honey, (2 Tbs for the 4 banana version), but I am using agave nectar this next time, and you can use sugar if you want. I actually found that after adding the honey, it was almost too sweet, but I do love my chocolate very dark.

Put it all into a blender and blend it up real good. It should get nice and runny and liquid-y. Pour it into a tupperware container or something freezer safe, and freeze it! (It's a little messy, but worth it!)
It doesn't take too long to freeze, and I couldn't wait for some, so I ate the runny stuff.
Enjoy!

Shuffle

2010-07-07T19:50:00.000-07:00

Ever have a good shuffle day? I have.
Let me explain: a good shuffle day is when you put your itunes on shuffle and you don't find yourself skipping any songs because they are all hitting your listening palette perfectly. Usually it's not something you notice, but today I think it was an extra good shuffle because I did notice that all of the songs were perfect for my mood. You are probably wondering why I even have songs that I would skip in my library, but sometimes you're in the mood for certain songs, and sometimes you're not.
Here's a sample of what I've heard today (backwards):

Linus & Lucy - Wynton Marsalis
C Moon -Paul McCartney
Velvet Sky -Los Lonely Boys
One Thing Leads To Another -The Fixx
Just What I Needed -The Cars
Someone Keeps Moving My Chair -They Might Be Giants
Again -Lenny Kravitz
Brown Eyes -Kirby Heyborne
Piggies -The Beatles (George Harrison)
Nobody Else -Los Lonely Boys
Hand-Me-Down Tune -The Avett Brothers
Until The Last Moment -Yanni
Colors -Amos Lee
Lean On Me -Bill Withers
M79 - Vampire Weekend

"Push the button, Max!"

Paul McCartney: LIVE!

2010-04-04T18:53:00.000-07:00

Life wish list: check one off!

I just got back from an amazing week in Utah and Arizona. Rrrrrreally amazing. Here's why:

First, I got to see my dad in the Timpanogos Valley Theater Company production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. (My dad did an awesome French accent!) This was his 4th (I think) show he's done with them- and they have all been great!

Secondly, I had an adventurous day with my sister and her friends. I walked all the way to school to have lunch with her, and walked home with all of them. We did a "hobo photo shoot" and watched Fantastic Mr. Fox (which I didn't finish.) Then I got to hang out with one of my best friends, Nate- and we both sucked at bowling, but it was still fun.

THEN, I flew to Phoenix with my mom where it was over eighty degrees! That's shorts and tee shirt weather, people!

Some great things about Phoenix in the Spring:

1. It's hot but not too hot. (50-86 F)

2. It's really green! (I thought we'd be in a sand pit!)

3. It smells INCREDIBLE! The neighborhood we were in use to be an orange grove, so the remaining trees blossom and I exaggerate not: the air smells like the best perfume ever. Not only did we get to smell the orange blossoms, but we ate fresh, juicy oranges every day! (PLUS- we went to the Desert Botanical Garden and they had a billion good smells because of the blooming Sweet Pea type of trees they had. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm.)

4. Arts festival! What more can I say? We bought some oil that smells just like the orange tree so I can smell like Phoenix Springtime all year!

5. Good food. (This is actually an all-year thing, but we had some dang good food there!)

Tee shirt designs I made for the concert.

Besides the fact that I love Phoenix- I was there mainly for Paul. Yes, that is right. Sir Paul McCartney in Phoenix- LIVE!

That man is 67 and he puts on the best show that ever was! (besides the Beatles, I'm sure) 3 hours of performing and NO BREAKS! He was BARELY sweating! And he still sounded energetic. The whole time! I sat next to a man who had seen the Beatles when he was a teenager! I LOVED being around Beatles fans especially when Paul sang SO MANY Beatles songs. I got teary during "Blackbird" and "A Day In the Life" in which he turned the third verse into "Give Peace A Chance" as a tribute to John Lennon. SO great. SO SO SO great.

I have to thank my mom for that amazing weekend. Thanks for the best birthday present ever!!!

And by the way, I'm 22 now.

Huaraches Update

2010-03-23T11:28:00.000-07:00

Sooo... I got the stuff to make the huaraches in the mail yesterday and I was very careful about measuring and tracing my feet so I wouldn't waste material. Except for one thing- I didn't flip over the pattern I was using and I cut out 2 right feet! Although I may dance like it- I DO happen to have a right foot and a left foot. So that means I have to order another kit. I'm going to make two left feet and I'll have 2 pairs of Huaraches! Luckily I made mine first because I had to make a pair for Garrett, too. Which, by the way, turned out perfectly. We just have to decide how to tie them.
Great news: Spring is finally here! It snowed yesterday, but it's been sunny and the snow is melting. I even went birding the other day. I've seen Stellar's Jays, Chickadees, an Osprey, and even made friends with a cute little Nuthatch.

Huaraches Hoorah!

2010-03-20T19:02:00.000-07:00

I've suffered from knee problems for about as long as I remember. It's pretty common in women, and it runs on my dad's side of the family. I've been hearing a lot about barefoot running lately and how it's so much better for you than shmancy shoes because it's natural and takes off joint loads. (This is only if you are not running around on unnaturally hard concrete all the time.)
I've done a LOT of research regarding my knee problems and also running- I love to run but didn't do it because of my knees. I have access to a lot of dirt roads and trails, but only a pair (a good pair) of Asics running shoes. I want to try barefoot running, but there is no way I could handle it with the callus-free baby feet I have. And in this day and age your bound to step on a nail or glass no matter how far out in the woods you are. I was SO close to getting a pair of these:

They are awesome Vibrams, and I loved the feel and freedom I had when I tried them out at REI.

Until...
I saw these:

What? Leather cord-wrap sandals... not to mention dirty!

Actually- they are ingenious, but at the same time something that is very common sense! Sandals used for running. (Not exclusively, of course.)

This particular style is called Huaraches which just means "sandal" in Español. Even more specifically, these are the Tarahumara Huaraches. The Tarahumaras were known for their running abilities- and they wore sandals like these.

So, I found a great website that actually shows you how to make your own! (They call them invisible shoes.) I thought about just following the steps and doing it myself with leather, but that seemed too soft and thin to protect my soles. Luckily, they sell kits so you can make your own Huaraches! And they are about 20 bucks. That's about a quarter of the cost of Vibrams. Now my feet can be somewhat barefoot and still be protected. I haven't gotten the kit yet, but I'll be sure to post progress when I make my awesome shoes!

Can't wait to feel the difference.

A Reason For Senses

2010-02-18T15:24:00.000-08:00

Photographs cannot capture one bit of what we really see. Especially when it comes to the beautiful creations and art that God has created. I am so grateful that I get to see those snapshots that can never be stored on a plastic card or printed on a piece of paper. For the reason that photos don't do justice, I'm going to leave this post without one. Now, I want you to go outside and look at the sky, or the snow, or watch a bird fly. Don't just look, breathe. Taste. Smell. Feel. Listen. Bask in the wonderfulness that is the world!

Sidenote

2010-01-07T15:49:00.001-08:00

I promise I am going to post something new on this blog, soon! For now, take a visit to http://artistrebel.blogspot.com to see my new art blog.

Leaping... and soaring

2009-06-20T14:29:00.000-07:00

My life is changing rapidly. Although it is not evident to others, I have been making many pivotal personal decisions lately. I feel like it's time for me to take charge of my life and leap from the nest, rather than wait to be pushed out. I'm ready to do some grown-up things and start a life of my own. It's thrilling, yet very frightening to think that I can't depend on others anymore. I have to take care of everything myself. Where will these decisions lead me to? I don't know, but I'm confident that God will guide me, and I know he wants me to be happy. All will work out. I've been told that I can do something about how I want things. I don't want to wait around for a good thing to come along, God has done that for me already. It's my turn to do my part in life.

I'm ready to get out in the world and experience life. I went to Brazil a little over a month ago and had a wonderful experience being immersed in the culture. I'll write more about that in my next blog though.

Once Upon a Mountain

2009-03-26T17:29:00.000-07:00

We approached the canyon. There was already a feeling of change in the air, like we had gone through an invisible gate to another world. The suburbs and the city were completely out of range and out of sight. Just the sky and the earth. The river we paralleled sparkled like jade through the shadows of the aromatic pines. I felt as if I could scoop up a handful of water and it would turn into gemstones. The rocks and hills rang out in their own powerful glory. I was so humbled in this organic tapestry woven by the Great Artist. I saw a frozen pond and felt the energy of life creeping around it just waiting on the verge of springtime. The days brought indigo skies and warm, sunny, freedom. The nights brought bright stars and a comforting blanket of silence. The moss on the trees spoke to my soul as if to say it had one, too. The air was life. I could only become more alive when I breathed it in. I began to grow in slow, steady rhythm with the forest. I existed only as it did. There was no other way to persist. To share the enchanting beauty was majestic and surreal. We were patches of morning mist, suspended just above the vital soil.

Oh.

2009-03-16T09:52:00.000-07:00

O is for:

Oranges are so sweet and succulent, how can one resist such appeal?
Oceans are beautiful. Whether I'm watching the whales from the rainy Pacific Northwest, or baking on the Brazilian beaches, I love the Ocean.
Oats make the best breakfast. Just add a little honey. They also make the best cookies: oatmeal raisin... Yummy.
October is my favorite time of year. I also love Halloween.
Onomatopoeia are fun to use. Plus, what would graphic novels be without them?
Ocelots are interesting. If you have never seen one, do so.
Owls are majestic. They are also a symbol of wisdom.
Oak trees have pretty leaves. They also make beautiful wood furniture.
The Office is a funny show that I watch every once in awhile.
Orange is one of my favorite colors. Especially Fall orange.

Advegtures are Fruitastic

2009-03-05T12:54:00.000-08:00

...and so is the title of this blog. I've really been trying to eat well, and increase my health for awhile now, although walking 8 miles a day was probably a little high to start with because now my knee is swollen and stiff. Besides exercising, I've been eating "healthy" foods. Which, in my opinion, should actually be categorized as delicious foods. I don't think you can get better than fresh tangelos, ripe bananas, and crisp carrots. I've always loved to experiment with cooking, especially when it comes to making pies, but lately I've been creating some healthier and even more delicious dishes with my culinary improvisation. By the way, I'm also avoiding sugary things; that means no candy, cookies, or other desserts. A sweet juicy fruit gives me the sugar I need.

This morning, I sliced up some golden delicious apples and put them in a pan with a little cinnamon and some honey (I find it to be the best sweetener) I let the apples cook until they were tender and soaked with flavor, then I added it to a bowl of hot oatmeal. It was really sweet, and I didn't feel too guilty about the honey, especially since it was breakfast and I needed power for an exam.

For lunch, I mixed up some steamed asparagus, sliced roma tomatoes, a little lemon pepper, and put them in a cream cheese coated tofu wrap. I covered a pan with olive oil and put the "pockets" in the oven for a few minutes. Then, voila! A delicious and nutritious meal.

Besides being creative with cooking, I've been doing some other "projects" with fruit and veggies. I love the color they have- it makes them look so much more appetizing. So I worked with some (silly) photos and created some "story photos." I also had fun with a few vegetables, just for an illustration.

Solitude

2009-03-02T12:04:00.000-08:00

With the coming of March, I find it hard to sit in room full of people mechanically taking notes and sucking up irrelevant information produced by droning professors. The first reason being that I would rather be taking advantage of the warm weather, instead of the artificial luminescence and tiled cubes that I must sit inside during the days. The second reason being that I am drowning in this sea of humanity. I relish the solitary escapes I can procure, especially the ones spent in nature. I've made a habit these past 2 weeks to walk up to the canyon where I find myself venturing off of the trail down to the water. The sound of rushing water is so comforting after hearing cars, people, and machines buzzing homogeneously. On occasion I'll read some Les Mis, or make a drawing in my sketch book or even in the sand.
I find myself more often when I am not in the company of anyone. Although I am truly never alone. God is always there, and I feel a strong connection to him when I allow my solitude to be utilized for such a purpose. I see his hand in all things, especially nature.
Why is it that so many of us must always surround ourselves with friends? Of course, there are numerous valid answers to this question, but sometimes I think we do it for the wrong reasons. To feel loved is great, to feel unity is wonderful, to be a friend to someone is fantastic, but we don't need to be in the company of others just to feel of worth, or even that our time is well spent. Do you ever just go to someone's place just so you aren't "bored," only to do the same or even less than what you were doing alone? I am guilty of this, tenfold. It is human nature for us to congregate. It's vital to remember that we do not only have or fellow men, but God as well. We must recognize that he is the one that matters the most. He sees our hearts, our thoughts, what we do and who we are when we are by ourselves.
I supposed I have redefined solitude when I say that when we are alone, God is with us.

All I Need Is Love

2009-02-11T17:19:00.000-08:00

I know how many people hate St. Valentine's Day, and that it's not a real holiday, but I am going to get into the spirit. This blog is about love, and how to express it. I am the kind of person that likes to receive and give affection by kind actions and thoughtful gestures. Just being in tune with me tells me that someone cares.

Show me you love me:

Listen to the Beatles while I'm in the car.

Tell me I have toilet paper on my shoe, before I embarrass myself.

Help me unload the dishwasher.

Ask me how I am- sincerely.

Remember my birthday.

Laugh at my jokes.

Offer me a ride- even if you know I'll decline.

Smile at me.

Listen when I talk.

Sing at the top of your lungs with me.

Be respectful.

Be honest.

Sit through my favorite movie.

Pick up something when I drop it.

Tell me I need to be home when it gets late.

Tolerate my annoying habits.

Deal with my interruptions.

Be kind to my siblings.

Offer me a bit of your ice cream.

Tell me your aspirations and dreams.

Walk with me.

Write me a letter.

Sit next to me.

Teach me things you know.

Encourage me to pursue my dreams.

Stand up for me when I'm not around.

Spend time with me.

Look into my eyes.

Be there for me.

Recommend a book.

Share a song.

Let me take a picture.

Fishing in a Puddle

2008-11-29T20:02:00.000-08:00

I have obviously been too imprudent with my time, as I have been watching movies, reading books, and playing, when I could be blogging. I felt guilty whenever I looked at the last post, knowing that a new post was past due. So here you are.

I have been wanting to mention a few things that I feel very strongly about that have come to my attention as of late. I don't want this post to sound to negative, so I'll say what I need to say, then move on.

It has been my experience that generally, people are honest, and good, but lately I have noticed that a lot of people are also shallow.

Why is it that some of the best people I know surprise me with comments that I find to be only skin-deep? Some comments are even completely inappropriate. I like to think that I am tolerant and forgiving when it comes to certain kinds of remarks about my appearance; honestly are those ever appropriate? I must vent out my frustration as I have been hurt by comments that have been made "only jokingly." (I apologize for the lack of detail, but I don't think it is necessary for me to even imply what kinds of things have been said.)

Really it comes down to this: women are not merely objects of beauty or pleasure, but are treated as if they were much too often. I do not wish to say that all men are superficial, hormone-driven beasts, because I only know a small number that I would actually put into that category, but I am disappointed to discover that even the kindest men I know will make degrading remarks about their female friends or acquaintances. In too many instances I have tolerated, and even laughed when a friend has commented on my appearance, apparently trying to "compliment" me, although I felt rather like a slab of meat than a person. Even more heartbreaking to me is hearing my guy friends talk about other girls in such a manner that in that instance I could not understand how I could stand to be around such two-dimensional company.

Just the other night, I was cooking a meal at the boys' apartment next door, when I heard them making some pert remarks about a woman on television. I stood over the stove in silence, my roommate and I quietly fuming. We quickly left the apartment and to our neighbors ashamed surprise did not realize why until the only guy in the room that understood explained it to them. My roommate and I unenthusiastically accepted a couple of apologies, unfortunately expecting a similar incident to happen again.

This disrespect for women must stop. I am tired of my friends or any girls for that matter feeling self-conscious because of the things that they have heard guys say. I have vowed to myself and my friends not to tolerate degrading remarks any longer. I realize that it is difficult for men (and women) not to have certain feelings or opinions, but they must also realize that everyone has a fragile self-esteem that can be greatly affected by even the smallest of remarks. I know that many women do their part to encourage this negative picture by wearing immodest clothing, or making remarks themselves, but there are those of us who try very hard to be respected. I am not asking to be treated like a man, just respected as a woman.

Listen to this song by John Lennon- it voices my pains.

Francine

2008-10-27T09:11:00.000-07:00

You, Francine. Ooh Francine.

You see something even when you close your eyes.

I don't know what it is, only that it seems to mesmerize.

I try so hard to strain my eyes so I can see it, too.

I wanna wake up with that look on my face.

The one I see you wear and it makes me wonder:

Is it color? Is it light?

Do you see floating lilies, or glowworms in the night?

What appears to you?

If I could, I would slip behind your eyelids while you're dreaming.

Francine, won't you let me creep unto your mind? Let me hear your symphony that's streaming.

You, Francine, Ooh.

Even when I think of your name

You feel it and place it in a picture frame.

It's there on the walls of your imagination.

Is there a door in that wall so I can come for a visit?

Francine, even a window would suffice. Just a little view would be oh, very nice.

I wanna sleep out underneath your stars.

The ones I see that shine in your eyes when you wander.

Is it inquiry? Is it thought?

Do you feel a great connection, or solace from the swarm that you have fought?

This is a song that I wrote the lyrics to; my friend Jordan Gibby is writing the music.

Back in Time

2008-10-13T06:53:00.000-07:00

New look= new post. I finally took the time to make my blog look somewhat how I wanted it to, but I haven't taken the time to post anything, but here I am. Finally.

Fall must be past the point of being official now because it's snowed for

3 days here. And it has not melted yet. I just home that I will be able to enjoy a few colorful leaves before they all freeze and fall off.

There's a lot of topics I could write about at this time, but I'm not even going to mention them. I think everyone gets a little stressed when they read any news these days. I will mention a few of my latest adventures, though. I went to an 80s theme

d dance on Friday night at the church Institute. It was really fun, especially the dressing up part. I was disappointed, but not surprised to find that 95% of the students were wearing aerobics outfits: spandex, big shirts with belts, leg w

armers, sweatbands and side ponytails. I know I was only born at the end of the 80s, but I'm also aware that everyone did not dress like that. I trie

d my best to avoid that cliche take on the decade, and I'm happy to say that the group of friends I went with did, too. I tried the denim look, with a skirt and a jacket. Of course I'm a thorough researcher, so I m

ade sure to

stay pretty accurate. The best part was my ruffly ankle socks with high heels. My feet ached and burned by the end of

the night, but the unique look was worth it. I was impressed with the DJ for playing 80s music as well, different genres and artists that almost everyone recognized. Ever since I heard about the dance, I have been on an 80s movie kick. Although I didn't sit through all of them, here is a list of 80s movies that definitely give you a taste of the decade:

The Breakfast Club- Definitely a more mature movie, but it's reminiscent of an S.E. Hinton novel with it's messages and raw look at social grou

ps.

Pretty in Pink- this one was made me cringe when it came to fashion. I couldn't believe the things the main character wore, or what she did to a vintage prom dress at the end. The best part of the movie- and why it's worth watching- is the character, Ducky, played by John Cryer. Watch it and you'll understand why I love him.

Summer Vacation

- I don't know how the heck I managed to discover this one, but it's definitely got to be on the 80s movie list. It has a predictable plot, but the ch

aracters are interesting, and like The Breakfast

Club, it demonstrates the 80s cliques in high school. In fact, now that I'm thinking about it, it's the same story, just with a lighter conclusion and less underlying messages.

Sixteen Candles- This movie is also mature, but then again, all of these movies are. Once again, it stars Molly Ringwald (also starred in Breakfast Club and Pretty in Pink). If you aren't past your teenage insecure stage, don't watch this movie. The first time I saw it I just felt depressed because of all the nightmarish and embarrassing situations she is put through. Of course there's a happy ending.

Teen Witch- Made for a younger audience, this cult film is fantastically cheesy. It even has a couple of super random musical numbe

rs that will cause you to watch the scenes over again. I love the clothes in this one when the main character goes from uncool, to "the most popular." The only part I have a hard time watching is that creepy little lady that plays the exorcist on Poltergeist. It's no Harry Potter.

Back to the Future- One of my absolute favorite movies, there is no need to talk about this one, because who doesn't love it? Michael J. Fox is adorable, and who can resist quoting the lines? "Hey McFly...."

21 Jumpstreet- Okay, this isn't a movie, but I happen to have 2 seasons on DVD, and I love it. Johnny Depp stars in this cop show that takes agents undercover in high schools. It covers a lot of big issues, but it stays light throughout. Besides, a 21-year-old Johnny Depp is impossible to resist.

Walking Through Life

2008-09-24T07:16:00.000-07:00

I seem to check my blog every day, as if a new post will just write itself, sometimes it's hard to make myself start, but here I am, waiting for the ideas to flow into the cycle that starts from my heart, processed in my brain, and down to my fingertips where I try desperately to keep up with myself.
A couple of weeks ago, I finally did something I had been waiting all summer for. I saw the production of Les Miserables at the Tuacahn theater in St. George. I shouldn't say I saw it, because it was more of a magnificent experience than just sitting and seeing. For anyone that does not know the story of Les Mis, learn it. I can't explain how moving the plot is. The characters, situations, settings, dialogue, conflicts, victories, and in this case the music are all woven together into a fantastic tapestry of aphorisms. I found myself with tears running down my cheeks and sobbing by the end of the performance. I am, in fact, starting the 1000 page original Les Miserables novel by Victor Hugo- just as soon as I finish my latest novel by Dickens. There are such a great number of wonderful books in this world, and so little time to read them all.
Something else I've done that has made me quite happy: running. It's been awhile since I have actually gone, but every time I do, I feel so so good. Now it's just about getting in shape. I honestly am doing it more because I want to be able to "run and not be weary" rather than lose weight. That is a plus, though. If one does want to lose weight, however, I recommend walking. I can't even begin to explain how amazing the results can be. Oh heck, at the risk of sounding like a weight-loss program advertisement (which I already do) I've lost 15 pounds just from walking to and from school every day! Honestly, though: walk. I also feel that walking is the best way to get around not only for health benefits, but also because it's better for the Earth. We don't want to corrode this precious planet anymore than we already have. Walking is a good way to tune in with nature as well. Then you can appreciate what you are helping to save. It's one big cycle of good Karma.

A New Way of Old Life

2008-09-02T09:23:00.000-07:00

I'm back in Cedar City. It's beautiful. I've gone to a number of bonfires, reunited with many friends, made quite a few new ones, and bonded with my brother. He lives in the apartment in front of me, which is very exciting, as I've been away from home for 2 years, not really being able to spend time with him until now. It's interesting to see how he has matured since his sophomore year of high school. He's more independent, insightful, and definitely more like me than I would have guessed. (He'll disagree with that statement completely.) Coming back to school almost felt like I was being pushed into the deep end with my jeans still on and my phone in my pocket. I wasn't ready, but at the least, I can doggie paddle. You'd think after 3 years, I'd get used to this. I doubt I ever will. Oh.. I also went to my very first rodeo! Yee-haw. It was freezing, but we got some fun pictures (above), and saw the most gorgeous sunset.

I mentioned my "Peace Album" in the last post, but I have lost the receipt that I wrote the tracks on the back of, so I'll try to remember the best I can:

Blowin' In the Wind- Bob Dylan
Give Peace a Chance- John Lennon
(What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love & Understanding- Elvis Costello
Abraham, Martin, and John- Dion
The Pipes of Peace- Paul McCartney
Belief- John Mayer
Fragile- Sting
Redemption Song- Bob Marley
Peace Train- Cat Stevens
Give Me Love- George Harrison
Muse- Bliss

Now there are a few more, but I've yet to find the list, so these will do for now.

On another note: last night I went "camping" to make up for my last "camping" trip, which consisted of sleeping in a trailer (not real camping.) My whole motive was to sleep under the stars, in the open air, on the dirt. So I did just that. It was amazing. As our small group spread out looking for what little firewood we could find (we weren't very successful) I looked up at the sky and couldn't help but shed a tear at the majesty of it all! It was like being showered with love. If God's love could take on any appearance, I know it would look like the sky. I dropped to my knees in the dirt and thanked him for the vast beauty that I was witnessing. Now that I'm high from seeing something so great, I can't help but want to sleep out every night. Even the coyotes that awoke me during the night didn't frighten me, they just further magnified my love for Mother Nature.

525,600 Minutes

2008-08-18T20:38:00.000-07:00

On this day, one year ago I started this blog. How fitting it is, seeing that school is starting, fall is beginning, and it is also Heidi and Rob's anniversary (congrats, you two!) I've blogged about reminiscing and change before, so I won't go off on that again. I feel that blessings is an appropriate subject for a "milestone" like this. I've been blessed since before I was born, with my parents, my family, my home, being in Utah. I can't think of a better place to call home. I see God's hand daily, and I hope that others recognize it, too. I've faced challenges, overcome obstacles, and learned lessons. I thank God for those things. I thank him for my very very dear friends: old and new. I can't express how much I love the people I am close to.

Enough mush. If you haven't made an account on Pandora, I suggest you get right to it! It has broadened my music interests, and introduced me to some incredible artists that I never would have heard of were it not for Pandora. Just go to the website, and you'll find out what it's all about. Terrence is doing well, although he picked a fight with Pablo today, and we had to separate them for good, which was going to happen anyway. The weather is growing colder, and I'm actually okay with it. Fall is my favorite season, I just wish it were longer. I've grown tired of war, and hearing about war, so I decided today to make a "Peace Album." More about that tomorrow. I'm sitting on my back porch in the dark, except the moon is full and bright, and beautifully milky. I can also see the stars... mocking me for looking at this computer screen instead of their twinklings.

Little Companion

2008-08-13T22:32:00.000-07:00

Today I finally bought a mouse. Two, actually. One for me, and one for my younger sister. I have been wanting to for awhile, and I finally made the purchase. My mouse is black and white, and hers is all black. They are both males, and very tiny and curious. We spent a good 90 minutes trying to decide on names, first coming up with famous pair names, then finally decided that they would be separated, so we gave them separate names, Terrence and Pablo. Terrence, first of all, because it is Steve McQueen's birth name. Second of all, my friend, Trent, suggested it as a name of a pet that I would have. Pablo is originally named after Pablo Picasso, but my sister just likes the name. Anyway, Terrence will be living with me at college in one week, it'll be interesting to see how the trip goes.

"Animals are such agreeable friends- they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms."

-George Eliot
LISTENING TO: Chris Merritt

Girl of 100 Lists

2008-08-12T18:25:00.000-07:00

I am a list-writer. I have many notebooks, of which, half of the pages are filled with lists. Never lists of what I need to do that week, or day. Never lists of classes that I have, or homework that is unfinished. Lists of everything but those things.

List of lists I have created (in no particular order):

1. Best Ice Cream Flavors

2. Most tantalizing male voices

3. Places I want to visit

4. Best-smelling scents

5. My crushes ages 8 to 18: "43 boys I've luvd"

6. Greatest rainy day songs

7. Favorite Toys

8. Perfect songs for Summer

9. Most Loved Literary Heroines

10. Most Loved Literary Heroes

11. Favorite Actors/Actresses of the 50s & 60s

12. Books to read more than once

13. Band Names (just in case)

14. Kim Makes Up Pies: Recipes

15. List of lists I have created

These are just a sampling of many other lists I have created. My newest, yet oldest, list is called my "Life List." It consists of things I have not done, but that I am determined to accomplish in this life. Some are really simple, and some are kind of a big deal. Here's the beginning of it: (also in no particular order)

- Travel to Brazil (Recife)

- See Sting in concert

- Sleep in a hammock

- See the sky from a high point, to view the entire dome, and nothing else

- Write 2 good songs on the guitar

- Get a puppy

- Go snowmobiling

- Go kayaking

- Visit Mt. Rushmore

- See Paul McCartney

- Kiss in the rain

- Paint another wall mural

- Sew a dress

- Speak a foreign language well

- Play/sing in a band

- Visit Liverpool

- Visit Tokyo

- Try every kind of cheese

- Change a life

- Master the art of sushi-making

- many other things...

"Ghetto blasters, phony jewels, cathedrals, castles, making up rules. This is a list of the things I love. I am the girl of 100 lists; from what I shall wear, to who I have kissed. Check items off, let nothing be missed, sing I to myself and my 100 lists..." -The Go-Gos

LISTENING TO: Band of Annuals

Superwoman?

2008-08-10T17:10:00.000-07:00

Usually when I blog... I can think of a million things I want to write about, but restrain myself, thinking, "Oh, I'll just have to be patient and write about that next time." Yeah, well, I can't remember what it was that I wanted to write about right now. It must be lack of sleep. I am beginning to doze off. My cushioned kitchen booth is starting to look like a really nice place to nap right now. Aaaaanyway...

I was listening to NPR this morning (as usual) and the news was being broadcasted about Russia and Georgia's conflict, rehab for juveniles, murder in Beijing, etc. I also overheard a few bits of conversation by my neighbors about mail-order babies, and it sparked my thinking a little. Or rather... it shook my soul. There are so many things going on in the world, and there are days when all I want to do is help make them all right! Where do I begin? After going to a convocation about bioluminescence and aquatic life, I immediately wanted to save the whales. Seeing how frustrating and terrifying cancer can be, I want to do anything that will help find a cure. I can't accomplish these things, however, and it kind of puts a damper on my soul sometimes. The great thing is, it's only for a short moment. I realize I try hard to make the world a better place, and that's enough. Prayers, faith, and trust in God, along with some service, dedication, and sacrifice can bring about miracles. Whether it's saving a single spider from being squished, or tutoring an underprivileged child, everyone can make some difference. It's also about being a Christlike example to others. Let them see your light. I can change the world. Cheesy, I know, but it's a big deal, and it's true. Try something selfless and see how you feel.

"Yes, how many times can a man turn his head, and pretend that he just doesn't see... And how many ears must one man have before he can hear people cry... how many deaths will it take till he knows that too many people have died? The answer, my friend, is blowin in the wind. The answer is blowin in the wind."

-Bob Dylan

A Hard Day's Job

2008-08-07T10:16:00.001-07:00

I know most people I associate with have not gone into their full-blown careers yet. We have part-time, and summer jobs so we can scrape our ways through college. Currently, I am working 2.5 jobs for the summer. I was working a third, at Bath & Body Works, but it was just too stupid to work 3 hours shifts 20 minutes away. My jobs right now:

1. Britches Inc: This is probably the most peculiar job I have ever had, although for others it may not seem so peculiar. Basically, I sit behind a counter in a boutique for 9 hours. Usually I Facebook (I'm ashamed), Blog (like right now), and read. Every once in awhile I'll get tired and have to stretch or excersize. If I'm lucky I'll have a couple of customers, and if I'm REALLY lucky, they'll buy something. It's a simple job, but I do have to study the great mysteries of the brassiere. My favorite part of the job is probably selling to husbands and boyfriends. I can tell they feel like I did before I worked here: "Is that like a permanent wedgie?"

2. Promontory Kids Cabin: The most draining job I have ever had, yet, it keeps me energized. Promontory Kids Cabin is like the mini version of Promontory Ranch club, it's just for kids. It's open 7 days a week from 9-5, and we do camps and workshops all summer. Every Tuesday I get to teach art, which can be fun and frustrating. To sum it up, I play with 4-12 year-old kids all day. It's a fun job! We did Movie Making Camp a couple of weeks ago, and I got to write the scripts. It's amazing what talents and dedication can show when kids are doing something they love.

2 1/2. Babysitting: Sounds like a job for a 14-year-old, right? Well, does a teenager get paid $20 an hour to play with a couple of kids, eat whatever he/she wants, and then watch TV the rest of the night? I think not. I should say that I "Nanny," except that it's not the same kids. I'm not complaining.

When I think about my future, I will sure be happy to be doing something I love. Being able to use my creativity and ideas to create anything! For now I'll just stick with selling thongs.

"Now I am older, the more I see, the less I know for sure. Now I am older, the future is bright and so is the hour." - John Lennon

Shawty

2008-08-06T20:55:00.000-07:00

My new goal is: to shorten the length of my blog posts! They are too much like essays. Nobody really wants to read essays. Done.

Writing

2008-08-05T22:54:00.000-07:00

"I should write a book."

A phrase I hear often. A line heard in films, read in novels, whatever. How often does it really happen. To say the least, there are millions of books in the world, published, in the process or otherwise. It seems as though we who enjoy reading are addicted to the printed word, keeping a place for each character, place, and lesson in our hearts and minds. But I'll talk about reading some other time.

If you don't want to read about my writing, please skip to the next paragraph. I've kept a collection of "novels" and other ideas for stories in a couple of journals since I was 14. None of those stories are even near half-way through when it comes to the vision I have for them. I realized about 2 weeks ago that my situation is like that of Jo March in Little Women, or Anne Shirley in that I seem to write dramatic fantasy tales, or vicarious teen novels. I tried a new source for my ideas. Not necessarily from personal experience, but from real-life characters and people that I have come in contact with one way or another. I began writing it, thinking about what I wanted to happen, then realized that I was going to go about it in a way that was more like an exploration of my mind than scripting out a basic plot. Thus far there is no romance and very little drama. It seems to come as a vision when I am writing rather than a conclusion that I must lead up to. It seems as though I come up with story ideas that have a beginning and an end, with very little plot in between. It's very easy for me to begin a story, but when it comes to filling in the plot, I tend to drag, and make little progression in the way of creating a climax. Another note: all of the stories I have started are about 40 pages long, and no longer. I just get so many ideas, and get bored with the old ones., that I have to start a new one.

Enough about that "novel."

How is it that authors retain such distinctive styles in their writing. Some that are so obvious, and others subtle enough that it is difficult to capture exactly what it is that distinguishes them from the rest. Is it the vocabulary? Sentence structure? The type of stories they tell, or character development? I have a hard time pin pointing which of these qualities my favorite authors encompass.

Think about writing. Do you have a knack for poetry, or great story ideas? Writing is a great way to get to know ourselves. I find that when I write in a journal, or blog, I learn more about my motivations, attitude, and ways of thinking. When you write without purpose, just free writing, it's like drawing a picture of your thoughts. It can be theraputic as well. Whatever the reason, write. Write your thoughts, dreams, what you see, what you do, how you feel, write about something you love. Write about something you hate. Write.

Happiness is...

2008-05-29T12:47:00.000-07:00

...getting stuck in the rain

...reaching a mountain peak

...seeing a rainbow in the mist of a waterfall

...having a ladybug land on you

...dancing in the rain

...finding your favorite kind of ice cream on sale

...putting on sweats, warm from the dryer

...jazz music

...the smell of rain

...seeing horses run

...looking in the mirror and loving what you look like

...finding the dress that fits you perfectly

...a lucky penny

...watching Animal Planet with friends

...a smile

...free pizza

...a spell of creativity

...a slow dance

...a wink

...lucky underwear

...jeans worn in just right

...finding money in a coat pocket

...a furry parka

...tie dye

...talking on the phone even after you can't keep your eyes open anymore

...laughing

...laughing hard

...laughing for no reason

...laughing at your own clever joke

...talking without saying anything

...a comfortable silence shared with a friend

...a good book

...a life changing quote

...a poem

...jumping in a rain puddle

...an exhilarating run

...seeing a hummingbird

...breathing in someone's scent during a hug

...holding hands with your best friend

...peace signs

...old couples

...nicknames (most of them)

...using your imagination

...family

...good cartoons

...crying with someone

...a homemade gift from a child... or anyone

...a warm gun

...sharing a sundae

...a cold slushie on a hot day

...fireworks

...birthday candles

...traditions

...The Beatles

...the smell of rain

...playing fetch with a dog

...going to the zoo

...a sunrise

...a cure

...an answered prayer

...a perfect kiss

...bare feet in the sand

...seeing fireflies for the first time

...a motorcycle ride

...a bicycle built for two

...seeing fireflies, anytime

...driving in the rain

...an old baby blanket

...a good true story

...being fascinated

...star gazing

...cloud watching

...the sound of the ocean

...the sound of crickets

...the sound of a stream

...going a day without having to retie your shoelaces

...someone telling you that you're beatiful

...and unexpected visit from a friend

...an expected visit from a friend.

...a real letter

...a soft sweater with long sleeves

...a good hair day

...the perfect shade of nail polish

...anything that involves rain

...gardening

...sunshine

...Christmas Eve

...giving

...friendship

...a newborn

...getting both armrests

...reading old journal entries

...taking pictures

...a good dream

...hot apple cobbler

...sushi

...sharing a common interest

...sharing a smile

...love

...being with your best friend

What's in a Name?

2008-02-06T20:38:00.000-08:00

I don't know how the rest of the world is, but I often find myself looking at an individual and thinking, "she looks like a Tiffany," or "if his name's not Richard, it should be." I find that I associate certain names with certain types of people. I can not picture, for example, anyone named Nathan being a red headed football player... that would have to be a Justin. I sometimes wonder if I fit my "name type." Am I a Kimberly? Do people look at me and say, "she's more like an Ashley?" Hopefully I'm memorable enough that people think of someone like me when they think of a Kim.

Last night I had a long discussion with my friends about names, mostly about what we wanted our future children to be named. "Rambo" was brought up more that a few times, and "Anthrax" was thrown in there, too. My favorites are Winston, Alex(andra), and Paul. James seemed to be liked by all, and we decided that Sedan is a terrible name for anyone... But what's in a name? "A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.." (Shakepeare's Romeo & Juliet)

Growing Up

2007-12-07T12:20:00.000-08:00

Maturity. How do we define ourselves when it comes to this? Are we childlike and immature? Are we responsible and "grown-up?" When I was young, I looked at those around me that were "bigger" and wondered how I would ever act like they did. I really never felt like I changed as my age progressed, and by the time I was an "adult" at 18, I felt like a kid still. In fact, I still feel like a kid. Even with so many changes, living on my own, and being around other adults, the concept still hasn't phased me. I got over the fact (although it's only been a year) that even though I am an adult- doesn't mean I have to change. That doesn't mean that I can run about irresponsibly, that just means that I can be myself.
I often think of myself as immature, but really, I think I have changed. The changes are subtle, of course, all coming from knowledge by experience. I took a step back the other day to look at the way I act, and although my personality is ultimately the same as it was before, I have definitely become more mature. I don't think twice about being myself, knowing that I am appreciated by those around me without acting like a "grown-up." Besides, look at all those "adults" I hang out with. They can't say anything about being "mature."
There is one thing I think I should say, in spite of my lack of experience in this field, but what about young adults that think they are mature. I'm talking about the 18 and 19 year olds that start to take on 25 and 26 year old responsibility when they are still very young. Personally, I believe those individuals are missing out. Especially the girls who marry very young, and become mothers. I am NOT saying this is a bad idea. It just could be. I have heard of too many individuals that have a hard marriage and life because they rushed into adulthood too soon, not ready for all of the responsibilities that come with it. There are many, though, who possess the right traits and qualities that are ready to take on anything no matter how young they are. I would not be able to handle a load like that, and there is so much I still want to do before I settle. School, travel, and becoming smart in relationships are a few of those things. I think in my heart I'll remain a kid forever.

Deep

2007-11-16T11:49:00.000-08:00

What is it that makes something "deep?" Is is the profoundness of the statement? The knowledge that is displayed? Or is it deep because it makes one really think? I've heard many people try to sound deep by using a "smart" vocabulary, or saying something that really doesn't make any sense. Poetic statements or questions may also seem deep. Perhaps they are. Perhaps I'm wrong about what deep is, but I'm going to write what I think of it, anyway.
To me, deep, is the wrong term to use. Because it is so general, I like to think that something is thoughtful, instead. Or perhaps it isn't even a profound or thoughtful statement at all- maybe what was said or written just provoked a thought. I guess I really have no conclusion for the question of what is deep, I just feel that the term covers a broad range.
Am I trying to be deep? No. Obviously, I'm not just writing about my day, or funny jokes that I just have to share. I just like to think. I feel that if I explore my own thoughts, feelings, and insights, I will truly discover myself. I am a person who likes to ponder the questions of life. I listen to talk radio because I want to know. I want to think about the world around me. I want to think about why we do the things we do. I want to think about my problems, and how to solve them. I want to think about my blessings. I want to think about how I can be a better person. I want to think about how I can make the world better. I can't think about any of this without learning how to think, however. I feel it is essential for one to know oneself before walking on the frail tightrope of others' feelings.
Deep? Perhaps. What do you think deep is?

Song of the Day: "Getting Better"- The Beatles

Ice Cream

2007-11-07T11:36:00.000-08:00

What is it about ice cream that makes it so well-loved? Of course, that's a question with many obvious answers, but let's think rhetorically now. Here are a list of reasons I have come up with in my short amount of blogging time:
1. It's delicious.
2. It has a very tolerable texture.
3. You can buy it for little money.
4. It's easy to serve/ eat.
5. It comes in thousands of varieties.
6. It provides a sense of nostalgia.

The last one on my list is one I dug out of my deeper realms of thinking, of course. Honestly, though, what are some of the earliest memories you have? I guarantee you've loved ice cream for as long as you can remember. I don't blame you. Ice cream is one of those treats that you can enjoy any time- and there are so many varieties, you won't be disappointed.

I've always wanted to visit Vermont so I can experience the Ben & Jerry's Headquarters. (I still haven't sampled half of their flavors.) Every time I go grocery shopping I end up splurging on a little tiny quart of Ben & Jerry's or even more delicious- Haagen Dazs. I can't pass by the tempting calls from the Brownie Batter, Phish Food, Cinnamon Dulce de Leche, or Oatmeal Cookie Chunk (the one currently in my freezer.) Luckily- most of these flavors are rich enough that I can consume a few spoonfuls a day- making the quarts last a few weeks.

On the topic of my favorite flavor: Mayan Chocolate. I was reading a review article by Orson Scott Card ( http://www.hatrack.com/osc/reviews/everything/2006-06-25.shtml) where he talks about Haagen Dazs (new) flavor, Mayan Chocolate. This immediately grabbed my attention: a) because I love chocolate, and b) because I pretty much open my mind with high respect to everything O.S.C. says. Mayan Chocolate was described as cinnamon and dark chocolate- my two very favorite flavors- and even more so when mixed together. I absolutely had to try this ice cream that I already knew was my favorite. I searched high and low... well the 2 grocers in my little home town, but neither of them carried what I wanted. I ended up waiting months until the day I found an online company that ships ice cream directly to your doorstep. Accidentally confirming my credit card number- and without the option of cancelling the $40 dollar shipping- I received my first quart of Mayan Chocolate ice cream the day before my 19th birthday. It was everything- and more- that I had expected. The perfect darkness of the creamy chocolate ice cream with a delicious warm swirl of cinnamon in all the right places. It really is the perfect flavor. Mmm.

If you aren't a fan of dark chocolate- I still recommend that you try Mayan Chocolate. My very close second favorite is Cinnamon Dulce de Leche. It's like an upgrade of the original Dulce De Leche. Obviously I prefer the richer, warmer tastes of cinnamon, but of course I do love fruity ice cream and a nice scoop of mint chocolate chip every once in awhile. Almost ice cream is good in my opinion whether it's gourmet or cheap gallon stuff. By the way, my next goal is to try Creme Brulee- also by Haagen Dazs, then perhaps the caramel cone. We all scream for ice cream!

No Regrets

2007-11-01T12:15:00.000-07:00

Time flies. Seasons change. So do people. Do you ever look back and wonder why you did or said the things you did? I do. I look back on my past and question my thoughts and actions, but then I dig deep and realize why I did those things. Reading journal entries from my past are almost embarrassing sometimes. For instance, I blush when I read every detail possible about a boy I had a crush on- then look up and realize that I'm only embarrassed for myself. I recall mistakes I have made, or cruel and unkind things I've said. I learn from these.
Look back on your life. Don't regret anything. No matter how stupid or silly things seem to have been, don't say that you wish it hadn't happened. You will find that if you use your mistakes as tools of learning- you will be a happier and wiser person. We are what we are mostly because of the choices we make and how we react to the world around us. If you don't want to have regrets, then act in such a way that you could never regret it. Be the kind of person who looks back on oneself and thinks, "I've had a good life." Be your best. Live without regret.

Belief

2007-10-18T11:43:00.000-07:00

A great thing about knowing God is that you always know that you are not alone in your thoughts and feelings. There's no catch, special circumstance, or fine print. He is there. Period. There is no reason for anyone to feel unloved or unwanted. God is "here, there, and everywhere." Faith and hope are what keep us going. Who hasn't been so desperate that they've asked someone out there for help- not realizing that God was the only one listening? In "It's a Wonderful Life," George Bailey is in a desperate situation saying, "Dear Father, I’m not a praying man, but if you’re up there and you can hear me, show me the way. I’m at the end of my rope. Show me the way, oh God.” How can we not believe in a higher being?

It's not all about religion or sects, though. It's about believing. Not just that someone up there is watching you and loving you, but about believing in yourself. It takes great faith for someone to climb a great mountain, or for a baby to take his first steps. But, they have to believe in themselves, first. John Lennon sang,
"I don't believe in Bible... I don't believe in Buddha... I don't believe in Gita. I don't believe in Yoga. I don't believe in Kings. I don't believe in Elvis... I don't believe in Beatles. I just believe in me."
You can't believe in anything or anyone until you believe in yourself. It sounds corny, but really- it is the key to life. I've been down on myself so many times in my life that I can't count- but I'm getting stronger, I'm growing in my faith in God, and in me. If I believe that I can get through something- and be happy- I will.
Believe.

Score: Love.

2007-10-08T07:27:00.000-07:00

We all have our difficult times and moments in our lives, things we can't control. We've been hurt by someone or some situation, and there we can turn to friends and family to be comforted. But...
What if YOU are the one who caused the pain?
Justification might work for some individuals, but if you are anything like me, it's better to be stung by the raw truth in realization that I've erred. Maybe if you are being too hard on yourself, justification is a necessity to help you get through. I'm not going to justify anything, though. Pain is my comfort. An oxymoron if there ever was one, but you might agree with me if you've ever made a horrible mistake that you can't take back. Making mistakes is all part of growing up and learning, and I realize that, but healing takes time. Is it a sin if you postpone forgiving yourself?
Another realization: It is possible to break your own heart. Everyone's heard that you never know what you've got until you say goodbye. Or maybe it should be that you never know how much you care for someone until you cause them pain. That's how it works. Life is one big irony. It's too bad that life isn't like baseball: 3 strikes and then you're out. That's not how it works. We don't have a pitcher giving us one out of just a few choices. Things come all at once sometimes, flying at you from every angle. If you strike out, you don't get to do it over. Don't get me wrong; second chances- even 100th chances- are given all the time, everywhere, but you can't take back what's already been done.
Why?
Why do we do the things we do? There are reasons for most of them, even the stupid ones. Sometimes, though, we don't have reasons or excuses. We just do stupid things. We just make mistakes. To boil it all down: it sucks. Do NOT go out and feel like life itself sucks, though. Think of your blessings, and all the people who honestly care about you. I certainly don't deserve them, but I've got them anyway, and I'm grateful. I know I can be strong. I know I can make it through, but this time, it's going to take longer because I'm the one who had the ball in my court, and I made a bad serve. I certainly have learned a lesson.

The Fall

2007-09-13T11:26:00.000-07:00

It's almost here. The best season of the year: Fall. I love the smell, the feel, and especially the sights of Fall. There is no season that can compare with the beauty of Fall. It's a pity that it seems to be the shortest season, especially in Utah. Summer goes, the leaves change for a split second, then it snows and we have Winter until May. Whenever I get excited for Fall, I'm always reminded of the movie, "You've Got Mail." It makes me want to buy a "boquet of freshly sharpened pencils." I miss getting excited to shop for school, paying the "large" student fees of $100. Now I dread emptying my pockets to buy a book and food so I can survive. But back to happy thoughts, since this post is supposed to be about Fall.
One of the greatest things about the season is the perfect weather. Hot enough to have a picnic or take a nap on the grass, yet cool enough to wear your favorite jacket, or go on a hike. A hike: that is what I'm planning in the next few days. My friend, Josh, told me of a hike that goes up to a waterfall and I'm really looking forward to some good photo opportunites and a nice day in the red Southern Utah mountains. Yesterday I went up into Cedar Canyon to take some photos of nature. I appreciate the photographers that take photos of, well, anything. I used an SLR camera and had to manually control the light and focus, but it was quite the task since I was sitting in the middle of the road to get just the right shot. I had to readjust several times because of cars that kept coming. It's amazing what a change in temperature and a few inches of the sun moving can do to a scene. I hope my pictures turn out.
Enjoy the fall. Enjoy every season for that matter. I'm so lucky and amazed that I live in a place where I get to experience the nature of all 4 seasons. I love Fall.

P.S. My friend Trent says he loves fall because that's when everything is dying. It's a wonder that death can be beautiful.

Last Day of Summer

2007-08-18T07:27:00.000-07:00

It's pouring outside on this last day of Summer. Not surprisingly, I love it. Living in a drought makes me thirst for weather like this every day of the year. Maybe I'll move to Seattle someday. The thing about the rain today is- Heidi's wedding.(" Isn't it ironic..") My very close friend is getting married today, and it's raining. She's not the type of person that would be upset over it though, so I hope the precipitation doesn't put a damper on her day.
This summer has been memorable- very emotional, and somewhat interesting. I haven't gone on any vacations, I haven't gone to Lagoon, or even to a swimming pool. I didn't go camping or fishing. I basically just spent time with my Katie and Sarah. I'm so thankful for Sarah. I've been through so much misery these past months and she's the one who has helped me have fun and focus on other things. I basically lost my best friend 3 months ago- and Sarah has helped fix the hole in my heart. Although, I know it will be long before that hole has completely disappeared. Today is the day I have to pack for college, go to a wedding, and figure out my life. Sounds like I'll be busy.
I'm really gonna miss being around my family.

Question of the day: How would you describe your style?
My Answer: I talked about this the other day with Sarah, and we both decided that we don't have a "style." If I did describe mine I'd say it was colorful and retro, but that would be too exclusive. I like so many different things. Whenever I go shopping with my friends, they point out things that are "so Kim" and, of course, I agree. For now, my style is just me.

Song of the Day: "A Day in The Life"- The Beatles

Peace Love & Raindrops,
Hee Hee

Memories

2007-08-17T13:17:00.000-07:00

Here is a compilation of memories and experiences I enjoyed while I was growing up:

Snowy: When my youngest brother, Matthew, was 3 or 4 (he's 16 ish now) he always wanted his name to be "Snowy." Whenever we played any games, he was always Snowy. Imagine a chubby-cheeked little blonde boy saying, "I wiss my name was Snowy." So cute.

Butterflies: This relates to the "Snowy" one. When my siblings and I were little, we'd name every butterfly we saw. All of the white butterflies were "Snowy." All the orange Monarch butterflies were called "Fireball." I think we thought that there were only 2 butterflies in existence.

Mush Mush: When I was about 6 or 7, and my brother, Michael, was 5 ish, we made up a game we called, "Mush Mush." It was modeled after the show "Lassie" which we had never actually seen. Michael played the sled dog, Mush Mush, and I played the girl owner... I don't think there was a name for her. We came up with a theme song that was to the "Lassie" tune- except I don't think the "Lassie" theme song has words. Not that it mattered. Our theme song was just "Mush Mush, mush mush mush mush." Sung by me in a weird old man voice. The best part of the theme song is that we posed for it. "Mush Mush" sitting at my side with my hand on his head- both of us there facing the wind in our front yard. It was classic.

President: My brother reminded me the other night about this game we used to play called, "President." It wasn't very accurate, but it was fun while it lasted. One person would be the President and sit with a "desk" (a box, usually) in the closet under the stairs, which was the designated office of the President. Everyone else playing would have to follow the President's orders- like running errands. One of which was always getting the President a pickle. We had to take turns a lot being President, I mean, who wants to be the President's "Pickle Fetcher" the whole time?

The Field: This was the greatest, most imaginative game Michael and I ever invented. The field behind our house was an array of different cultures, creatures, landscapes, and adventures. It was so real- even in my memory it seems like it was real. Before entering the magical world in the field, we had to spin around 3 times on a man-hole cover that was in our backyard. Our names then changed to Cindel, Leia, Luke, and whatever George Lucas characters we could think of. We had a magical rock that was a safe haven from the giants and swamp people. The dried canal bed was a cursed river that would pull you under and to the other end of the field where the giants lived. In the east there was the Swamp village- where if you were wearing green- you would get kidnapped by the swamp people. And of course in the South there was the Ewok village, where we'd go visit the Ewok families that lived in giant dirt mountains. I still remember exactly where everything was and what everything meant and did. I'd gladly give a tour to anyone that wants to explore The Field.

Hide & Seek: This wasn't the hide and seek you play by hiding under beds or behind chairs. It was extreme. It was amazing how big our house seemed when we created so many creative ways to hide. Michael was the stealthiest at the game, climbing on top of the washer or counter and standing as still as possible in the dark so nobody would spot him even at eye level. I would disguise myself as a garbage bag or laundry basket to camoflauge myself from whoever was "It." My brothers were also very good at making themselves small enough to fit into toy kitchen cupboards and hide there.

Dragon: Dragon was a game we played in the evenings when our parents were watching TV, reading, talking, or being occupied by something other than us. We pretended that the adults were the "Dragons" and we had to sneak past them, and spy on them without being seen or heard. We devised complicated escape plans and secret signals. It was like being a Navy Seal.. sort of.

Talking Carpet: Michael and I used to pretend that we could hear the carpet talking. We'd put our ears on the floor whenever Matthew was out of the room and listen to him through it, pretending it was the carpet. It only ever worked with his voice. I guess our carpet was just a kid.

The Car Game: For some reason, we always thought the sneaky games were the most fun. We used to wait in our front yard for cars to come, and when they did, we'd yell, "car!" and hide behind something before we got hit by the car's goop. For instance, if we weren't hiding behind something when a yellow car drove by, we'd get hit by mustard, a blue car, and we'd get hit by water. The worst was the UPS truck. It meant death. This one really was scary because my best friend used to tell me that the UPS truck really did kidnap little kids. What can Brown do for you?

Dat Dat Doggie: When Matthew was really little, he was afraid of dogs, but tried to be brave when he saw one. Whenever a dog was around he would shout, "Dat dat doggie!" So that it wouldnt hurt him.. or something like that. It was cute, nonetheless.

Swastika: One time when my cousins were over and we were preparing for battle, we decided that we needed a flag for our army. I was young enough that I didnt know what a Nazi exactly was, but old enough that I had seen all of the Indiana Jones movies and had seen the Swastika used by the bad guys, so I drew it on a piece of paper and put it on our playroom door. My dad questioned me a lot that day after we played that game.

I probably have a million more games and things in my head, but can't exactly think of them right now. Hopefully Michael can remember some and help me out on this one.

Peace and Love
Hee Hee
(another memory: my brother couldn't say "Sissy" when he was little, so "Hee Hee" became my name ,and later, my nickname.)

Thanks to Michael

2007-08-17T12:59:00.000-07:00

This is my first post. Not very exciting, I know, but still. There's a first time for everything. I decided I needed a blog so that I can be as awesome as my brother, Michael. I found out he had one and read some of his posts. I didn't realize so many of his feelings and experiences. It made me sad to read some of his earlier posts- the ones about him breaking up with his girlfriend. I wish I would have been more supportive as a sister. He needed it, I think.
I'm just really glad to read that he has been a happy guy lately. I'm so thankful that he has amazing friends that influence him for the better. I wish I could be as cool to him as they are. It's hard to be a "cool older sister" when I'm not exactly the "cool older sister" type. In fact, I let my brothers influence my tastes more than I let my friends because I care more about what they think than what other boys think.
I found out that the Goo Goo Dolls are coming in concert to my school's homecoming next month and since my brothers love them so much, I bought us all tickets. I'm really really excited for them to come and stay with me in Cedar. Hopefully my "cool" points will go up. And as cheesy as it may sound, I hope it's a good bonding experience. I'm going to post more, but since this blog is getting long, I'll post a new one.
Peace and Penicillin
Hee Hee
(I just had my wisdom teeth out- yuck.)