Thursday, October 18, 2007


A great thing about knowing God is that you always know that you are not alone in your thoughts and feelings. There's no catch, special circumstance, or fine print. He is there. Period. There is no reason for anyone to feel unloved or unwanted. God is "here, there, and everywhere." Faith and hope are what keep us going. Who hasn't been so desperate that they've asked someone out there for help- not realizing that God was the only one listening? In "It's a Wonderful Life," George Bailey is in a desperate situation saying, "Dear Father, I’m not a praying man, but if you’re up there and you can hear me, show me the way. I’m at the end of my rope. Show me the way, oh God.” How can we not believe in a higher being?

It's not all about religion or sects, though. It's about believing. Not just that someone up there is watching you and loving you, but about believing in yourself. It takes great faith for someone to climb a great mountain, or for a baby to take his first steps. But, they have to believe in themselves, first. John Lennon sang,
"I don't believe in Bible... I don't believe in Buddha... I don't believe in Gita. I don't believe in Yoga. I don't believe in Kings. I don't believe in Elvis... I don't believe in Beatles. I just believe in me."
You can't believe in anything or anyone until you believe in yourself. It sounds corny, but really- it is the key to life. I've been down on myself so many times in my life that I can't count- but I'm getting stronger, I'm growing in my faith in God, and in me. If I believe that I can get through something- and be happy- I will.

Monday, October 8, 2007

Score: Love.

We all have our difficult times and moments in our lives, things we can't control. We've been hurt by someone or some situation, and there we can turn to friends and family to be comforted. But...
What if YOU are the one who caused the pain?
Justification might work for some individuals, but if you are anything like me, it's better to be stung by the raw truth in realization that I've erred. Maybe if you are being too hard on yourself, justification is a necessity to help you get through. I'm not going to justify anything, though. Pain is my comfort. An oxymoron if there ever was one, but you might agree with me if you've ever made a horrible mistake that you can't take back. Making mistakes is all part of growing up and learning, and I realize that, but healing takes time. Is it a sin if you postpone forgiving yourself?
Another realization: It is possible to break your own heart. Everyone's heard that you never know what you've got until you say goodbye. Or maybe it should be that you never know how much you care for someone until you cause them pain. That's how it works. Life is one big irony. It's too bad that life isn't like baseball: 3 strikes and then you're out. That's not how it works. We don't have a pitcher giving us one out of just a few choices. Things come all at once sometimes, flying at you from every angle. If you strike out, you don't get to do it over. Don't get me wrong; second chances- even 100th chances- are given all the time, everywhere, but you can't take back what's already been done.
Why do we do the things we do? There are reasons for most of them, even the stupid ones. Sometimes, though, we don't have reasons or excuses. We just do stupid things. We just make mistakes. To boil it all down: it sucks. Do NOT go out and feel like life itself sucks, though. Think of your blessings, and all the people who honestly care about you. I certainly don't deserve them, but I've got them anyway, and I'm grateful. I know I can be strong. I know I can make it through, but this time, it's going to take longer because I'm the one who had the ball in my court, and I made a bad serve. I certainly have learned a lesson.